A common piece of professional advice for handling workplace conflict is: ‘Don’t take it personally.’ If you often say this to a colleague who is upset, I encourage you to rethink your approach. You may as well ask them to stop their heart from beating. When we are upset, controlling our emotional reaction is nearly impossible because our biology is already in motion, and trying to override the brain’s natural threat response is as difficult as controlling any bodily function that works on autopilot. In the short term, especially when our awareness of ourselves is compromised, it’s nearly impossible.

Maintaining clear boundaries in the workplace is essential for a smooth workflow and a positive environment. However, ignoring the impact of neuroscience can be counterproductive and may harm employees’ wellbeing. This is not a new concept in management science. The Job Demand Control Model was developed by Robert Karasek in 1979 and later expanded by Töres Theorell and others; it supports workplace boundaries and the neuroscience of stress responses as being vital to the wellbeing of employees.

Employee wellbeing goes beyond physical health and job satisfaction. It is a holistic state of psychological, emotional and physiological safety that allows employees to thrive. It recognises that both past and present stressors, including trauma, influence a person’s ability to engage, collaborate and perform effectively at work. This mindset is in stark contrast to what many of us have been told since our first job: leave your personal issues at home. Stay unemotional at work. Expressing feelings is unprofessional.

Not only are these statements dismissive, they are unrealistic. In 1994, American psychologist and researcher Stephen Porges introduced the Polyvagal Theory, highlighting the powerful connection between our bodily experiences and the voices and faces of the people around us. Given that most of us spend the majority of our waking hours at work, this dynamic plays a crucial role in our interactions with colleagues.

At its core, the Polyvagal Theory explains that our brains are hardwired to detect threats in our environment based on past experiences – without engaging the thinking mind. Deb Dana, a well-known clinician and author who uses Porges’ Polyvagal Theory to heal trauma, describes the autonomic nervous system as working like an internal alarm system that is always checking: ‘Am I safe?’ When our brain’s radar encounters something that resembles a past threat, a stressor or hurt, our emotional brain takes over, triggering a visceral response before we can consciously process what is happening. The emotional brain signals the body to react and the rational brain temporarily goes offline. At this point, the brain shifts into one of three fundamental physiological states to ensure survival: 1. Seeking connection (asking for help); 2. Flight or fight (responding with action, escape or avoidance); 3. Freeze (shutting down or dissociating).

The response the brain chooses depends on the level of perceived danger and how much it trusts each survival state to keep us safe in that moment.

Neuroscience is crucial to employee wellbeing because it explains how the body responds to stress – and how failing to manage this response can harm both individuals and the business as a whole. Put simply, stress is the body’s reaction to something the brain perceives as unsafe or as beyond our coping ability. What qualifies as ‘unsafe’ is not just about physical danger. It can be anything that triggers an emotional or psychological threat based on past experiences. A dismissive comment might remind someone of past rejection, triggering a defensive response. A tight deadline around a meaningful assignment could activate feelings of pressure and failure, making it hard to focus. Ever found yourself procrastinating at work? You are not a ‘procrastinator’ or a ‘lazy worker’. It is likely that your brain is making you avoid a task because of the stress response it has triggered in your body. A punitive boss may bring back memories of strict authority figures, leading to heightened anxiety. An abusive client could mirror past toxic relationships, pushing an employee into survival mode.

Since humans naturally try to make sense of things, these automatic signals shape the stories we tell ourselves and influence how we experience daily life. This is how trauma affects us.

Trauma is not the thing that happened to you. It is the impact left behind in your nervous system from the thing that happened to you. It is the story of how you survived something that was too difficult or overwhelming to process. It is our experiences with trauma that shape how we react in the present moment.

Trauma responses go deeper than surface-level behaviour. They trigger biological changes that support the body’s safety mechanisms. When we are stressed, our body activates the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis, leading to a surge of stress hormones. This causes changes in heart rate and blood pressure, breathing, digestion and muscle tension, and if not brought back to balance, they prevent the body from healing naturally, eventually leading to a long list of health issues including heart disease, a weakened immune response and digestive issues. Prolonged stress and dysregulation of the nervous system (the inability to bring the body back to balance) can create biological conditions that may increase cancer risk.

This may be an uncomfortable reality to acknowledge. However, how your employees feel matters – not just for their wellbeing, but also for the quality of their work. If reducing sick days is not a strong enough reason to train managers on how to support employees in managing stress, consider the fact that employees who can regulate their emotions effectively are better decision-makers, more resilient under pressure and ultimately more productive.

Then, there is the ‘B’ word: burnout. Burnout is not just about working too much – it is a sign of nervous system dysregulation, and happens when employees face prolonged stress, a lack of a sense of safety, and don’t have opportunities for proper recovery. Ignoring the role of the nervous system in workplace wellbeing doesn’t just hurt individuals; it impacts the entire organisation.

If you lead a brand, team or organisation and want to integrate neuroscience-based approaches into your workplace, the key is to cultivate a culture of psychological safety and emotional regulation. In the field of organisational wellness, this approach is known as being trauma-informed.

At its core, being trauma-informed means that you bring the body into the conversation. A trauma-informed organisation recognises that the nervous system plays a crucial role in how employees interact, communicate and perform. This means considering nervous system dynamics when designing workplace policies, including communication strategies, conflict resolution, office environments and team-building efforts. By acknowledging how stress and past experiences shape behaviour, companies can create a work culture where employees feel safe, supported and able to thrive.

This is perhaps the most crucial step. Creating a trauma-informed culture cannot be imposed from the top down, nor can it be achieved through a single workshop. Every team member – leaders included – comes to work with their own survival instincts in place, prepared to defend themselves against perceived challenges. You cannot simply force the brain to override its programming, as change is inherently uncomfortable.

However, even if employees agree to this approach as part of their jobs, it does not guarantee they will fully engage in the deep work required to cultivate safety within their own nervous systems. They must sincerely ask themselves if they want to learn how to bring about this kind of change and are willing to connect with difficult emotions as part of this process. True transformation requires willingness, consistency and trust, not just compliance. This kind of change has its challenges. Resistance may show up in mood swings, sick days, silent treatment and zoning out. But it’s not impossible. The Trauma Release and Wellness Centre in Karachi offers comprehensive training programmes for organisations that want to move towards being trauma-informed. Their founder, Aun Ali, and his team have worked with several organisations, including NGOs and a school. They are affiliated with the Arizona Trauma Institute and offer smaller, educational trainings for individuals interested in mental health-related experiences like burnout, food addiction and overwhelming anxiety.

One of the main trauma responses in any organisation is compliance, says Ali. A crucial question for a leader then becomes: how do we help team members hone the practice of seeing the difference between compliance as a trauma response and actually connecting with this work? Late last year, Ali invited my co-founder, my team and myself to begin the intentional and ongoing journey of becoming trauma-informed. As a co-lead of a wellness space, this approach quickly became essential – not just for our work, but for me personally as both an individual and an entrepreneur.

The heart of this approach is intentionality. Here is how Ali explained the process unfolding. Once employees opt in, the next step is education – helping them understand how their nervous system reacts to stress and equipping them with tools to self-regulate. This includes recognising their particular versions of the fight, freeze or fawn responses; learning techniques like movement and breath work to reset the nervous system and understanding how workplace triggers (such as tight deadlines and conflicts) activate stress responses. For example, managers can be trained to recognise signs of stress (withdrawal or irritability) so they can support team members effectively, rather than misinterpreting their behaviour as disengagement or poor performance. This is not a recommendation for managers to pose as therapists. It is about demanding excellence safely.

A trauma-informed workplace encourages openness about emotions rather than suppressing them. Employees should feel safe to name their stressors without fear of judgment or retaliation. This requires shifting workplace norms away from outdated beliefs like ‘leave your emotions at the door’. Instead of expecting employees to suppress their frustrations, a trauma-informed team might use structured check-ins where employees can briefly share how they are feeling before diving into work.

Once employees feel safe to express themselves, an effective way to help deactivate the reaction is to learn how to separate memory from the emotion, as many workplace conflicts stem from unresolved past experiences rather than the present situation. Trauma-informed organisations help employees recognise when they are reacting to old wounds rather than current realities. If an employee reacts strongly to feedback, it may not be about the feedback itself but rather an old experience of feeling unheard or undervalued. Recognising this helps them process the body’s response in a way that supports balance.

This must come from the head of the organisation, along with a sincere belief in the value of incremental change. Building a trauma-informed culture is not a quick fix and requires long-term investment. Organisations must be willing to invest in ongoing training rather than a one-time workshop. They must prioritise wellbeing initiatives in the budget, such as coaching, mental health resources and flexible work policies. Most importantly, the leadership must accept that change happens gradually and celebrate small wins along the way.

As leaders, we must model emotional regulation and psychological safety in our own interactions. This means allowing oneself to be vulnerable and transparent about stress and wellbeing, as this will normalise the conversation for your team. In short, we have to do the work. Are we ready to change the ways we have protected ourselves for so long? And are we willing to experience the discomfort that comes with change?

Many leaders will resist this approach and from my own experience, I can understand their reluctance. Shifting toward a trauma-informed workplace requires a fundamental change in how we handle conflict, stress and interpersonal dynamics. It challenges long-held beliefs about professionalism and emotional regulation. For our team, embracing this approach has been transformative. Every weekly meeting starts with a co-regulation exercise we do together as a team like breath work, stretching, tapping, humming, shaking or other self-regulation tools we have practised. It was tough at first. Some members felt overwhelmed after focusing on their breath and body. Eventually, a few months in, we began witnessing small changes in each individual and their team lead.

Once an organisation commits to being trauma-informed, the workplace no longer has space for backbiting, suppressed frustration or toxicity. Rather than allow unspoken tensions to fester, clear protocols are in place to address conflicts safely, openly and without judgment. Employees don’t have to suppress their emotions or pretend that stress doesn’t exist; rather, they learn how to navigate challenges with awareness, regulation and mutual respect. This shift does not mean eliminating difficult conversations or lowering standards – it means creating an environment where challenges are addressed in a way that promotes psychological safety, accountability and growth. Instead of brushing off emotional reactions as unprofessional, a trauma-informed workplace acknowledges them as natural responses and provides tools to manage them constructively. Organisations have the choice to make neuroscience-backed approaches part of company values, showing that wellbeing and performance are interconnected, not separate.

Saman Ghani Khan is a trauma-informed life coach and co-Founder, The Physical Wellness Centre. samanghanikhan@gmail.com