Living the Abundance Mindset

He may be known as an adept director or a well-dressed, tall and good-looking actor with a thick mop of hair. But Adnan Malik has shifted his goals and is now entrenched in wellness and healing – and living an authentic life with a purpose. Clearly, this chapter of his life is one that seems to give him the most fulfilment.

Having a purpose has always been important to Malik, a characteristic he partially attributes to his father, a cardiologist whom he remembers as someone who always took the time to speak to his patients, making them feel better by interacting with them and not just by prescribing pills.

Nature was another influence. Malik was brought up in Islamabad, which he describes as a “hamlet” with a stream running in his backyard. “Islamabad was picturesque and nature-orientated. I played a lot of sports and captained several teams. I had a lot of adventures there.”

Like a “good Pakistani”, Malik left Islamabad to pursue a degree in economics at Vassar in 1999. He found economics “depressing” and shifted to film history, theory and production, and then made a documentary centring on Bijli, a transwoman. The documentary was a finalist at the Student Academy Awards in the US and won an award at the Kara Film Festival in Pakistan.“The documentary changed Bijli’s life because she felt that her story had never been documented in this way before. It made me realise that I could create work that communicates with people and changes lives.” It was a realisation that would later shape his life.

After moving to Karachi in 2005, he made another documentary, this time on Pakistani cinema. He also worked as a model for various brands, as a VJ for MTV Pakistan and assisted his brother Saqib Malik in ad film production. Eventually, he established Adnan Malik Productions (AMP), which made documentaries and TVCs, working with brands such as Coke, Nescafé, Tapal Green Tea and Wall’s.

This period fashioned his work philosophy, which subtly challenged norms. “I felt that advertising should be a win-win-win situation for the brand, the audience [by giving them something of value or something to think about] and myself,” he says. He also points out that in many TVCs, he featured women in roles that could have been considered unconventional at the time.He found Coke Studio a particularly rewarding project because it was well “aligned” with his vision. He worked on seasons two to six as a video producer with Zeeshan Parwez. “Rohail Hyatt created music that vibrated at healing frequencies that affected different chakras, and I learnt a lot from him. The brand benefitted; the audience heard beautiful healing music, and the musicians were paid well and received a lot of “exposure.”

In 2019, his acting career took off with Hum TV’s Sadqay Tumhare, where he played the role of Khalil-ur-Rehman Qamar opposite Mahira Khan. Later, he worked on projects that included Cake and Churails.

Given his advocacy for women’s rights – as well as causes such as violence against children and climate change – I ask Malik why he chose to play Qamar, given that in real life he is a confirmed misogynist. His response is that when Sadqay Tumhare was released, Qamar had not been as vocal about his misogyny as he is now and that the script was beautiful. When I comment that perhaps Qamar’s infamous line from the 2019 play Mere Paas Tum Ho – “Do takkay ki aurat” – didn’t necessarily mean that he was referring to all women, he replies – softly yet firmly – “No comment.”

When I ask about the alleged derogatory comments that Qamar made about him, he responds without the least bit of sarcasm that although Qamar is a great writer, a lot of what he says betrays the fact that he is suffering from an unresolved trauma, probably due to his relationship with women and should seek help. His response seems to come from a place of quiet self-confidence and serenity, and he does not rush to defend himself or attack Qamar, as others may perhaps have been prone to do.

Nevertheless, playing Qamar along with a fast-paced advertising career led to burnout, and he began therapy. “Acting and advertising were not particularly fulfilling. I was putting in more energy than I was creating, and even though I received fame and made money, I was physically and mentally exhausted.”This turned into the beginning of his wellness journey, which led him to multiple cities, including Chiang Mai and Fethiye, to participate in wellness retreats, including those organised by the Emergence Brotherhood, and to acquire several certifications in healing and wellness.

Malik is now a neuro-linguistic programming coach and works as a trainer with the Emergence Brotherhood. He is also a somatic coach, therapist and group facilitator and is pursuing a three-year humanistic and psychodynamic therapy certification with the UK-based CPPD.

Malik views his current life as the most rewarding so far because it allows him to help people improve their lives. The wellness circles that he leads are very important to him, especially the ones exclusively for men. In his opinion, men in patriarchal societies are pressured to “be a man” to the extent they have lost the ability to emote or communicate, and in some instances, this has led to suicide and violence. His wellness circles help men communicate more effectively and assist them in healing from past encounters that may have involved violence, bullying, harassment or caused them to feel shame due to various reasons.

Another aspect of Malik’s work is helping people realise they are ‘whole’. He believes that pop culture has made people think they are only complete when they are with someone else, a mindset that can lead to codependent relationships that can cause self-doubt, infidelity or separation.

Reflecting on his past, Malik muses that “everything happens for a reason. Acting found me even though I never wanted to become an actor. I became a director because I wanted to help drive change. My personal philosophy has always directed me to change people’s perspectives for the better and bring things from the periphery into the mainstream. I wanted to create a universal language of emotion. Acting and directing enabled me to become a good communicator and change things. I always wanted to create a healing impact on people.”

Speaking of emotions, I can’t help but ask why he posted a video of himself crying on his Instagram page, In the Presence of Adnan. He replies, “As part of my journey, I have been trying to cry daily. I recommend it to my clients because crying is a normal response and can be therapeutic; there are many types of tears, be they ‘victim’ tears or healing ones. I practise the latter; they help me deal with emotions and move on. This is what I teach as a somatic coach – to ‘move’ emotions such as anger, joy or sadness – because emotions that are ‘stuck’ have negative physical or mental repercussions. The video was an act of courage, and many people saw it that way; some questioned it, but my response was, ‘If we can post about travelling, dinner, or a cricket match, why can’t we share emotions?’ I wanted people to understand that social media can be used to heal; it doesn’t have to be a performance.”

Looking ahead, Malik plans to air a podcast and establish a website for his Instagram page and expand his work as a somatic coach. He is still open to acting and advertising as long as the projects “align with his value system,” which means living authentically devoid of shame or pretence. For now, though, it’s clear that Adnan Malik is content with his “abundance mindset” (seeing the glass half full) – and living his life in the most “authentic” manner.